The peril of a “should” value

A participant at my workshop said one of the wisest things that I can't stop thinking about...

"The peril of a "should" value can't be overstated."

When I've done values exercises in the past, it's usually involved picking values from a list, which for me, is the surest way to end up with a big ole list of "should" values. 

But when you're making choices in line with "should" values, you're creating a recipe for disaster. You're taking action based on external definitions of success that will never allow you to feel fulfilled in ways that are meaningful to you. 

You'll keep climbing the ladder, or jumping to new jobs, or chasing the promotion that you don't know if you actually want, or trying to force your passion to be expressed through your work, wondering why it isn't working. 

For this participant, my values exercise was life-changing. He had struggled in the past to authentically and honestly define his values but my work concretely helped him see what they are, based on his choices for the past 25 years.

He wrote, "It's great to be able to look myself in the eye in the mirror and authentically say that these matter to me."

And a list of values that authentically matter to you makes your decisions SO much easier. Those values facilitate what I like to call Easy Yeses and Easy Nos where you can enthusiastically accept or confidently decline an opportunity based on how it aligns. 

If you're living from the land of "should" values and want to find that list of values that authentically matters to you, grab a copy of my book, Right For YOU. It’ll get you incredibly clear so you can go through life with epic levels of clarity and confidence.